Dreams Will Become Reality.

I have a good relationship, a loving one, but somehow I want more. I want to be able to tell my mom about us without her having a fit and saying that school is my first priority and getting a scholarship because I know that. I want to her to know so far I’ve been doing good in school with a boyfriend and no troubles.  I want her to know that I’m 16, almost 17, and I’m not a baby anymore. I want her to give respect to where it’s due because I’ve done some shit, but honestly I’ve grown up to be a well presentable young lady. I want to be able to have him over my house and for us just to hang out without my brother (who is 6 years old) constantly saying he wants to kill him and he hates him. I want my family to stop making a joke out of things when they mention him. I want him to tell his parents and family about me so I can meet them. I want them to like me. I just want something . . something better for our relationship, because I know it can get better if things could get resolved or fixed. It’s like sometimes I have this double life about actually being with him and then getting home and having to hear my brother talk about him and act like I don’t talk to him anymore. It sucks to want to be with someone so openly so everyone knows how you feel about each other, but it can’t happen for so many reasons. It really sucks . .

(Source: beyondordinaryx3)

Life is pretty good right now. Sometimes I think about others who don’t have the same privileges I have and I am truly thankful. School is good for me. I’m doing good in all my classes - History, English, Chemistry, Trigonometry, Physical Education, and DEAR. I participate in every class and I’m proud of myself for that. This 2010-2011 school year is flying by and time is really speeding up. Soon by September I’ll be a senior writing my applications for colleges. I’m glad though that I can say for my 3 years in highschool so far I’ve worked to my hardest ability and although sometimes I’ve slacked I’ve managed to keep my grades decent. Well there’s that and then March. March is the month I will be 17 years old. I feel like I’m growing up so fast, but I’m still a child. March is also the month of my 1 year anniversary with my boyfriend. That is shocking to me. I’ve never gotten that far with someone on a serious level like that. I’m amazed at that, but then again I’m happy he’s become a part of my life and I hope he never leaves. School, March . . Family & Friends? Well my family I mean here and there my mother and I don’t see eye to eye, but compared to some parents she’s a real good one. I hate her sometimes, I love her sometimes . . its a teenage thing. My brother . . he’s growing up so fast he’s almost 7 years old (We’re 10 years apart). I’m glad like me he’s doing good in school (it’s something in our genes) because for a 1st grader he has all B’s. My grandma . . I love her she’s grumpy, but that’s just the way she is and I try to appreciate her more because I don’t know when she’ll be gone. Friends is another story. Honestly in school I have about 2 close girlfriends and like 4 guy friends or so. I prefer guys cause they’re much cooler and easy to talk to then girls, but the girls I hang out with they’re just as cool. I don’t talk to the set of girls I use to because they always have some issue or drama in their lives that is just a bit overwhelming and annoying. Oh well. Overall things in my life are looking up, and I hope things stay good for me.  

(Source: beyondordinaryx3)

Being a teenager is too much stress..

Theres so many problems coming from different angles; family, friends, teachers, and people you don’t even know. Judgements made solely on how you look. Feeling like you’re never good enough. Doing things to impress the people you hang with. Struggling to be “perfect”, but never making it. Wishing you weren’t so insecure. Hoping people like you for you. Trying to find someone that is just like you.

It’s so overwhelming..

Tired of it all honestly..Ready to move on

(Source: hiddenbeautyx3)